Category: Uncategorised

Summer Series! Duty to Accommodate

Hello Everyone! I am back from vacation and ready to roll!

This summer I am going to be breaking down the Duty to Accommodate into a weekly blog series that will be posted every Sunday night and will continue during the summer.

Why?

What I am witnessing is this. 👉Parents who use human rights language in their advocacy are experiencing higher rates of success in getting their kids the accommodations they need.

I am going to be REALLY breaking down the duty to accommodate. Into weekly digestible accessible chunks. We will look at where the written authority comes from for all of this, as well as key language words. By the end, I am not going to just provide you fish, I will be teaching you HOW to fish. Because context and learning how to apply the duty to accommodate to your specific situation is what is going to make all the magic happen.

You don’t need to be a lawyer to understand this stuff. We can all learn about human rights and how to apply them. Human rights are constantly evolving and advancing. The schools want you to think that this stuff is more complicated than it actually is.

First blog coming July 13th. Let’s get rolling!

I also wanted to take the time to mention that this month is my 4-year anniversary of starting up Speaking Up BC. 😁😁😁

4 years ago I decided to launch a website. The goal was to share with other parent(s)/guardians all the information that I was learning along the way. Everything that I wish I knew earlier. So many things I found to be hidden in education, and it felt by chance I was stumbling along and learning all of this. So much unbelievable stuff was happening. I trusted way too many people who, as it turns out, absolutely did not have my children’s best interests at heart. I would have given anything to have someone warn me. I was so desperate for information, seeking, searching, for anything that would help my children.

So, I started up my own website, and I started posting information about the external complaint systems I was navigating and started blogging. Writing to me gives me peace. One thing is super clear to me over the years. We are very powerful when we network and share information. People need support. It’s really hard to do this on our own. And so I attempt to be a lighthouse. Take it or leave it. Up to you. But I am here. And I am never shutting up.

How do we Heal?

I have been asked questions by a few parents that all boil down to the same thing.

  1. How do we heal?
  2. How do we move through this?
  3. Is there a light at the end of the tunnel?

I am not quite sure I am the best person to be answering these questions because I will be transparent, I am struggling with these issues as we speak.

There are a few things I do know.

  1. How do we heal?

I have a degree in criminology. Victims report over and over again that when a sentence is given to a person by a judge who harmed them or their family members, it creates closure, but it never heals them. The healing part now rests in the hands of those who have been harmed. The victim needs to figure out how to heal without the involvement of their abuser.

The question is then, how do we heal from things no one is ever going to apologize for?

Schools never apologize. Ever. They have all clearly been given the same instructions. No matter how severe the harm, they will not apologize. They will never admit liability. They know we could be recording. They won’t do it. They enter the plea: not guilty. If we are waiting for an apology and our healing is dependent on that in order to move forward, we are in trouble.

Healing is also not linear. I am really not in a place to give tips on healing. It is a messy process. One I think, is a worthy goal to work on. I don’t want to be angry for the rest of my life. I want to let this shit go. I hope that we all heal, as individuals and as a community. It’s hard to heal when you are still in it.

Healing is so individualized, but worthy of the effort in figuring out what you need to do to move on with peace.

2. How do we move through this?

While you are in the school system, it can be a state of survival mode. After having two kids graduate from the public school setting. Here are my suggestions.

a. You absolutely need to find yourself some kind of support system. A support group, a friend, a Facebook group…. something. Someone who is experiencing something similar to you. We need our people like we need air. We can experience and tolerate and move through a lot of shit, as long as we KNOW we aren’t alone. It’s when we feel separated from the pack, alone and unprotected, that we aren’t going to make it. Community care is essential.

b. Self-care like nobody’s business. This is going to look different for every person. If you need a bath every night before bed to survive, take it. If you need to ask for help from a neighbour so you can go for a walk once a week, ask for help. I am one who writes and needs to get everything out of me on paper. I journal a lot. We need to regulate our bodies. If we don’t prioritize our own regulation, no one else is going to do that. Don’t put your sex life on the back burner. Our bodies and brains need it. Watch comedies. Laughing is so important. Find relaxing activities to do within the limitations and opportunities in your own life. Find healthy things to increase your dopamine levels, naturally.

c. For me, I run on anger. It’s gas in my gas tank. Take your emotions and make them work for you. Figuring out how to do this is worth the effort and how people do this, will be dependent on how you process things.

d. There are counselling programs that offer therapy that is either free or very low cost. These can be great!

3. Is there light at the end of the tunnel?

I don’t know. I can’t guarantee you that it will only get easier from here on out.

But what I can tell you is that I truly believe there is ALWAYS hope.

All we need is a little bit of hope. I have hope in people. There ARE really good people in this world. There is goodness in us. You never know what is around the corner.

One of the quotes that I love from Judith Heuman, a disability activist, is:

“Change never happens at the pace we think it should. It happens over the years of people joining together, strategizing, sharing, and pulling all the levers they possibly can. Gradually, excruciatingly slowly, things start to happen, and then suddenly, seemingly out of the blue, something will tip.”

Who would have ever guessed that the Ombudsperson BC would do an exclusion investigation??? Didn’t see that one coming!

When I was in university in my early twenties, my most favourite teacher of all time ended her class with giving everyone a mustard seed in a bag. I didn’t realize that it’s connected to a religious verse. But the point of this message was, that as long as you have hope as small as a mustard seed, nothing will be impossible for you. Mustard seeds are very tiny. I can tell you that I still have that mustard seed over 25 years later in my wallet. I have always carried it with me.

She was a very special teacher. I almost dropped out, and she convinced me to stay. So, yeah. This mustard seed that she handed out to the class has stayed with me for 25 years. I just need a bit of hope. That’s it. It has served me well.

I have a couple favourite quotes.

“When you walk to the edge of all the light you have and take that first step into the darkness of the unknown, you must believe that one of two things will happen:

There will be something solid for you to stand upon, or, you will be taught to fly.”

― Patrick Overton, 

My other poem that I love, I found on a locker door of the EA I was replacing. I was an on-call EA when I was in university. The ride on the metro one morning to work was when I really started thinking about dropping out. I spoke to my teacher the next day.

The poem I found on the EA’s locker I was replacing that morning was this.

“Risks

To laugh is to risk appearing a fool,
To weep is to risk appearing sentimental.
To reach out to another is to risk involvement,
To expose feelings is to risk exposing your true self.
To place your ideas and dreams before a crowd is to risk their loss.
To love is to risk not being loved in return,
To live is to risk dying,
To hope is to risk despair,
To try is to risk failure.
But risks must be taken because the greatest hazard in life is to risk nothing.
― Leo F. Buscaglia

To me, in order to have hope, we have to weed through unknown territory. Never knowing how things are going to work out. We need hope. We need to risk moving forward without knowing the end results.

Never lose hope.

I find reading documentary books or reading about history to remind me to always hope. There have been some incredible people who have done incredible things, against all odds. Whatever you have to do to keep the hope alive, it’s worth it. Reading about disability history to me, feeds me. We stand on the shoulders of giants.

New HR Decision… and it’s LOADED

ooohhhh gather around for this one!

Lots of interesting learnings in this decision.

Thank you, thank you, thank you to the parent who brought this decision forward.

It was a win for them personally and a win for us for this analysis.

Here we go. This is an exclusion case & Indigenous rights.

Parent obo Student v. BC Ministry of Education and another, 2025 BCHRT 112

There is a lot in here, so I am going to list the important parts that I see.

  1. Ministerial order analysis
  2. Section 11 appeal was dismissed, HR complaint continues
  3. Timeliness application
  4. Ministry of Education dismissed

Respondents Defence Strategy

[10] The School District says that in April 2019, it decided to place the Student on a partial day program pursuant to the Ministry’s Special Needs Students Order, M150/89 [ Ministerial Order ], which states:……

(This policy is used as the school district’s defence to the exclusion in this case.)

[12] In or around 2019, the Student was diagnosed with Attention Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder-Combined [ ADHD-C ], anxiety, and Oppositional Defiant Disorder [ ODD ].

[13] The School District says the Ministerial Order clearly applied in the Student’s circumstances. It says that shortly after the Student started kindergarten, her teacher raised concerns regarding some of the Student’s behaviours related to self-regulation and ability to follow expectations in the classroom, which indicated a need for extra support. The School District says these behaviours escalated during the period of January to March 2019, and included task avoidance, touching others, eloping from the classroom, disrupting the class environment, being unable to follow simple adult directions, and running through the school. In response, the School District says it began implementing more interventions and support for the Student. However, despite these additional supports, the School District says the Student’s behaviour continued to escalate to the point that neither her educational needs, nor those of her classmates, were being met.

The parent made a section 11 appeal

18] The parties agree that the Parent went through the following steps of the appeal procedure:

a. Step 1: appeal to the school principal who upheld the decision to place the Student on a partial day program.

b. Step 2: appeal to the Assistant Superintendent, Learning Services for the School District, who upheld the school principal’s decision.

c. Step 3: appeal to the Superintendent of Schools, who upheld the Assistant Superintendent’s decision.

d. Step 4: appeal to the Board of Trustees for the School District. The Board issued its decision on November 28, 2019, stating that they did not deem it appropriate to require that the Student be immediately returned to full-time attendance at school.

This is SUPER important – take a look at the reason for the appeal not being upheld

[20] The Superintendent of Appeals summarily dismissed the appeal concerning s. 2(2)(f), and an adjudicator rendered a decision dismissing the appeal under s. 2(2)(b) finding that it did not have jurisdiction to hear the appeal because the Student had not been suspended from school [ Ministry Appeal Decision ].

Because the student hadn’t been suspended!!

They do this a lot!

This is VERY important learning for us.

Ministry of Education – Dismissed

So the parent filed against the Ministry of Education as well. They were dismissed from the case. No surprises here. We have seen this over and over.

[31] The Ministry says there has been a clear legislative choice, as set out in the School Act , to divide the roles and responsibilities for K-12 education in BC between the Ministry and the School District. The services the complaint claims the Ministry ought to have provided have not been delineated as within the scope of the Ministry’s jurisdiction and/or authority and would involve an inappropriate intrusion into the role and responsibilities of the School District.

[32] Further, the Ministry says there is no evidence that it had any involvement in the decisions or actions related to the Student’s educational program. The Ministry provides funding and oversight at a high level with respect to K-12 education.

Ministerial Order does not excuse them from human rights process

Now this is SUPER INTERESTING!

[38] The School District argues that the allegations in the complaint fall outside the jurisdiction of the Tribunal. Specifically, the School District says the complainant is improperly attempting to challenge the validity if the Ministerial Order through the Tribunal’s process. The School District notes that one of the remedies sought in the complaint is “changes made to the School Act to protect children who have special needs,” which is beyond the Tribunal’s authority. The School District says it has the legal authority to put students on a partial day program pursuant to the Ministerial Order, under section 75 and 168(2)(t) of the School Act . In this case, the School District says that the Student demonstrated behaviour which met the criteria for a partial day program as set out in the Ministerial Order.

[39] I agree with the School District that the Tribunal does not have the authority to overturn the Ministerial Order or to find the Ministerial Order itself invalid. Similarly, the Tribunal cannot order that changes be made to the School Act . However, I am not persuaded that the allegations in the current complaint are outside of the jurisdiction of the Tribunal.

See what I mean by the respondents will always have an argument.

The stuff they come up with is fascinating.

I gotta hand it to them, they are creative.

The tribunal’s response was this:

[40] Although reforms to the School Act are raised in the complaint as a potential remedy, I read the allegations as encompassing concerns about the manner in which the Ministerial Orders were applied in these circumstances, and the impact on the Student as an Indigenous child with disabilities, rather than the validity of the Ministerial Orders themselves. This is not a complaint challenging the non-discretionary application of legislative criteria, for example. The determination of the “educational needs” of a student with special needs or other students, as well as the appropriate alternative programming for a child with special needs, per the Ministerial Order, are discretionary decisions made by teachers or other School District personnel. These decisions, if influenced by the protected characteristics of an affected student, are within the Tribunal’s jurisdiction to review.

[43] I do not agree with the School District’s characterization of this issue as one of jurisdiction. Rather, it is part of the human rights analysis the Tribunal must undertake in any case and would more appropriately be raised under s.27(1)(b) or (c) of the Code . Nevertheless, I consider whether the allegations against the School District raise an arguable contravention of the Code under s. 27(1)(g) analysis below.

[44] Accordingly, I deny the School District’s application under s. 27(1)(a) of the Code .

Woohoo!

Now, another benefit of this decision is that the respondents know that this argument wont fly with the tribunal. So, this case helps to whittle down their arguments. That is very good.

AND if this wasn’t interesting enough, we even get a timeliness application.

Timeliness Application

[50] I am satisfied in the current circumstances that the allegations form a continuing contravention, and the most recent act of alleged discrimination occurred within one year of the filing of the complaint. I am further satisfied that the allegations pass the “arguable contravention test.”

What is a continuing convention of the code?

[47] A complaint is filed in time if the last allegation of discrimination happened within one year, and older allegations are part of a “continuing contravention”: Code , s. 22(2); School District v. Parent obo the Child , 2018 BCCA 136  at para. 68  . A continuing contravention is “a succession or repetition of separate acts of discrimination of the same character” that could be considered separate contraventions of the Code , and “not merely one act of discrimination which may have continuing effects or consequences”: Chen v. Surrey (City), 2015 BCCA 57 at para. 23  ; School District at para. 50  .

Here are some important allegations that give us a peek into what the parent was dealing with. Always know with these decisions, we aren’t getting the full picture. Decisions are written up to only include the information that is needed for the decision. There is ALWAYS more to the story.

a. February 1, 2019: The Student was put on partial days of school and was not allowed to participate in school activities or be in attendance with her peers;

b. March 1, 2019: The previous vice principal said: “it just gets to a point in the day where we just don’t want to deal with [the Student] anymore”;

c. April 1, 2019: The Parent was called to the school to pick up the Student because “she was having trauma triggered behaviours and several school staff including the principal, vice principal, and EAs had her cornered in the classroom and she was scared, trapped, and in distress;

d. June 1, 2019: The principal said to the Parent: “have you thought about transferring her to a different school?”;

e. June 1, 2019: The Student was separated from her class and was not allowed to be in a classroom with other children;

f. August 1, 2019: The previous Assistant Superintendent said school staff do not want to work with the Student because she is a “dirty girl”;

g. September 1, 2019: “Step 1” meeting with the principal to appeal the decision not to allow the Student in school full time – denied;

h. September 1, 2019: “Step 2” meeting with the Assistant Superintendent to appeal the decision not to allow the Student in school full time – denied;

i. November 1, 2019: “Step 3” meeting with Superintendent of Schools to appeal the decision not to allow the Student in school full time – denied;

j. November 26, 2019: “Step 4” meeting with Board of Trustees to appeal the decision not to allow the Student in school full time – denied.

In conclusion – public interest too!

[66] For these reasons, I find that the complaint is timely. Had I reached a different conclusion, I would have still found that the public interest favours accepting this complaint. The education system has been identified as a common area of human rights concern for Indigenous children: BC Human Rights Tribunal, (2020) “Expanding Our Vision: Cultural Equality and Indigenous Peoples’ Human Rights” at p. 27; Ontario Human Rights Commission, (2018) “To dream together: Indigenous peoples and human rights dialogue report” at p. 40. Courts and Tribunals have taken notice that Indigenous women and girls have been, and continue to be, particularly subject to hurtful biases, stereotypes and assumptions, including that they are “unintelligent” or “people of low or bad character not deserving of the same respect, humanity and dignity as others”: R. v Zakuti , 2021 BCSC 2253 at para. 25; Lindsay v. Toronto District School Board , 2020 HRTO 496 at para. 23. Here, the Student as an Indigenous girl who has been denied full access to the public education system, requires that this complaint be situated in its full socio-historical context. The Code ’s purpose of identifying and eliminating persistent patterns of inequality associated with discrimination protected by the Code is served by this complaint being heard at a hearing on the merits: s. 3(d).

And here is this beautiful statement

Dismissal denied – Complaint Proceeding

[68] I deny the application to dismiss the complaint against the School District. These allegations will proceed to a hearing.

I really encourage you to read the case in full. There are a lot of interesting details in there.

Due to the parent’s persistence in bringing this case forward, we have some very interesting legal analysis that are advancing the human rights code. This decision is now an advocacy tool and we are learning about what we need to do.  The piece about appeals being denied around suspensions is very interesting to have this documented.

It would be interesting to see a section 11 appeal done if the school refuses to log it as a suspension. Topics to discuss amongst education advocates, the importance of exclusion being labelled a suspension.

A big thank you to this parent’s advocacy.

“If not you, then who?”

I was at a kids’ baseball game, they were around grade 8 & 9. The ball went soaring high up in the air, into right field. The kid just stood there and didn’t move. The ball landed a few feet away.

The coach yells out, “If not you… then who?”

I am not writing this to comment on the coaches comment. I do think about this a lot. I visually replay this event in my mind. I thought about this a lot, going through my child’s human rights complaint, determined as all hell, all the way to a hearing. If not me….than who? This is the ball of crap that has been hit hard straight into my zone. If not me, then who?

Who else is going to do this? My neighbour? Our dentist? What about my friend who lives across the street?

The answer may sound obvious, but there is a twist.

Of course, it has to be me. Or does it?

When you go through the human rights process, you can self-represent, or you can have a lawyer and there is a THIRD option.

You can have anyone be your advocate and be your representative. It could be your neighbour. It could be your friend who lives down the street. It could be anyone to support you and help you through the process.

Is there someone in your life who can work with you together on this project, and you all work together as a team? You can both be crafting emails. You can both be preparing for a mediation meeting. You don’t need to do this alone.

If not you, then you and a support person. That’s who.

Just something to think about and consider.

Here is information on the BC HRT website about this.

Rule 7 – Representation before the Tribunal – page 4 in the table of contents


How participants may be represented
(1) A participant may be represented by a lawyer or other person, or may be self-represented.

(2) The representative may be:

(a) lawyer or other person authorized to practice law in British Columbia under the Legal Profession Act, or

(b) a person who acts as a representative with no expectation of a fee, gain or reward, direct or indirect, from the participant they represent, except for persons identified in s. 15(3) of the Legal Profession Act.


You will see it in cases. It will look like this.

Text:

Tribunal Member: Devyn Cousineau

Agent for the Complainant: Dr. Bob Uttl

Counsel for the Respondent: Jamie Hoopes, Alyssa Paex, and Ilan Burkes

Participating in the Duty to Accommodate

If you are someone who is asking for accommodations for yourself at work or your child in school, we also have obligations under the Code to follow. If we do not follow this, than our human rights complaints can be dismissed.

Rennie v. BC Ambulance Service, 2025 BCHRT 104

[29] Further, Mr. Rennie obtained a medical letter dated April 13, 2015, from a psychologist. There is no evidence that this letter was provided to BC Ambulance prior to the present complaint proceeding.

[30] In these circumstances, I am persuaded that BC Ambulance is reasonably certain to prove at a hearing that Mr. Rennie failed to participate in his accommodation process by not communicating with BC Ambulance, and its obligation to accommodate came to an end. Therefore, Mr. Rennie’s complaint has no reasonable prospect of succeeding.

This complaint was dismissed.

We have to participate. This falls under the “Duty to co-operate in good faith”

Both parties are expected to do this. Both sides need to communicate.

If the school is ignoring you, keep all those emails that you didn’t get a response to. Those will also be important.

And…

If the school is communicating with you. You can’t ignore them either.

To read about the expectations and responsibilities of the duty to accommodate process read here

Some parents feel that the communication they receive from the school is meant to poke them or bait them. I highly suggest you read 5 Rules on How to be Untouchable. Also keep in mind the communication between the parties needs to be in good faith, so if you feel there is anything sneaky going on, always keep the emails.

The point of the communication and co-operation needs to be focused about figuring out which accommodations work and which ones don’t. Accommodations don’t need to be ideal or perfect, just “reasonable” enough to provide the person with “a ramp”.

So, provide documentation. Communicate in good faith. And one more extension from this topic for parents in education is the Duty to Facilitate. Very similar to this case, but for parents. Failure to facilitate a school decision can lead to your human rights complaint being dismissed.

Knowledge is power.

Know your rights and responsibilities under the Duty to Accommodate.

It’s a two-way street.

National Accessibility Week

May 25th – 31st

This week is National Accessibility Week, which makes me want to highlight the Accessible Canada Act.

Let’s break this down by asking

What?

So what?

Now what?

Let’s begin.

What is this? Well, it is law that is made by the Canadian Government. This is the federal law. There are other Accessible Acts that are provincial. But since this week is National Accessible Week, I am going to start off with the federal Accessible Canada Act.

The goal is to help people with disabilities expereince more equity when accessing services from the government.

The federal act applies to federal government services and larger big private companies like Air Canada, or banks. Smaller businesses or provincial government businesses are under the Provincial Assessibilty Acts, like schools or community centers.

So what? You can file a complaint with the Canadian Human Rights Commissioner (which is federal). This is different from a Human Rights Complaint.

In December of 2024, The CHRC wrote an Accessibility Plan Progress Report

Accessibility Legislation was only assented in 2019. So we are still in the infancy of all of this. I mean, really….. this only came to be in 2019. I guess better late than never.

Now what? We need to use this!! Providing feedback to companies about their services and what barriers we are experiencing is an important way to advocate for changes which will help other people in the future. This is another way to use law to help us in our advocacy efforts and make our country more accessible.

Accessibility reports are expected to be published for the public to reach and feedback on accessibility should part of websites.

Most of us though will probably be providing feedback on a provincial level.

That is the Accessible BC Act.

Here is the plain language summary of the Accessible BC Act. LOTS of great information in here that is easy to digest. It talks about fines, and what will happen if organizations or services don’t do anything. How it will be regulated, etc. This info is also available in ASL.

So, woohoo!

Cheers, to another avenue, so we can be annoying to other people who don’t want to change! And maybe some who do…

Society is starting to be bend a little.

Every step matters. It all builds. Little by little. We need all of it.

AND

Each School District has an accessibility committee who reports to the Board of Education. They should all have a plan on how to address accessibility issues.

The more visible we are and the more we become part of the education, inclusion becomes more real.

#NationalAccessibilityWeek

Policy – “Soft Policing”

Policy is known as “soft policing”.

Policy is not law.

It is literally a group of people coming together and making stuff up. Sometimes policy is based on evidence, and sometimes it is not.

School districts have a lot of policies. I highly recommend you go to your school district site and find the policies and the administrative procedures. They may not be located in the same area. Some district websites are easy to navigate, others not so much. It’s worth the hunt. Policy will likely become part of your advocacy at some point.

A huge role for the Board of Education in your district is to create, review and revise policy as needed.

When they update or add a policy, they will, or should, be posting it publicly for public feedback. This will not be an announcement that gets emailed to you. It will take parents/guardians to be alert to these kinds of things being posted on the district website and to follow what is happening in board meetings.

Many districts have an online option for attending board meetings. Which I really like. You can multitask while you have it on in the background. Or if you are finding a part particularly boring, you can turn off the volume. Sometimes board meetings are interesting AF. Drama ensues. Showing up in person can also be informative. See who talks to whom, and you can feel the energy in the room that you can’t do over video. There are opportunities to have conversations with the trustees during break or after the meeting that can be helpful.

I HIGHLY suggest you get to know your district’s school trustees. These are the people who are creating these policies, bylaws, approving budgets, making section 11 decisions, and overseeing the superintendent and secretary-treasurer. The board appoints these people to their positions.

If there is a policy that you would like to bring to the board for consideration, you can certainly email them and discuss this with them. Their role is to listen to you. You can suggest amendments to the current policy, and next time they review their polices, you never know, your suggestions might make it in.

By reading up on policy, you may realize there may also be avenues for you to resolve your issues that you didn’t know were an option. For example, the whistleblowing policy. That is for everyone, not just staff. If you have someone in a position of power who is lying to you or being unethical, this is an option for you to consider in reporting it. Especially if you feel that the issues are not being addressed by the district staff. The whistleblowing complaints are reported to the board.

When there isn’t any transparency and people feel untouchable, it can lead to a lot of funky-monkey business in school districts. It is shameful when the system tries to cover it up. I hate to say this to you, especially if you are a new parent to advocacy. Please don’t be naive. This isn’t care-a-lot, and people in education are not sugarplum fairies. Staff have a fiduciary duty to their employers. Some of these people are wolves in sheep’s clothing. As you advocate and navigate the system, you’ll be learning who is who. Some people are genuinely the kindest and most caring people you will ever meet. The others…will become clear.

Something to keep an eye out for…as policy is not law and can be discriminatory.

Get to know your board, their policies, and administrative procedures. If you want to make changes, email away.

The Flaw of Inclusion

There is one part of “inclusion” that worries me.

You can be in a room with 100 people and feel utterly alone.

Depending on the type of disability you have, you may not meet someone with the same disability as you until you are an adult.

Just because you are in the same room with a bunch of people, doesn’t mean you feel like you belong there. That you are accepted. Hell…it doesn’t even mean you’ll be tolerated.

Growing up with other people who don’t have anything in common with you, at the core, and experience life differently… is bizarre. It’s like watching a movie.

People with rare diseases will travel halfway around the world just to be in the same space as someone else so they can talk about everything they are experiencing and have someone say the words “me too!”.

There is a reason humans have such a strong desire to be around other people who mirror similar elements to themselves. We feel seen. Understood. Real.

Inclusion as a concept is great. Fully support it.

However….

This is one flaw that I really don’t like.

The one good thing about grouping people with similar characteristics together is that they get to meet other people just like them, and those friendships and bonds are stronger than anything else.

Kids in gifted programs will report that they finally meet other kids who are just like them, and they feel “normal” for the first time. Educate Deaf children together and we have the learning of American Sign Language, Deaf culture and a community. At stuttering conferences, many report that meeting other people who stutter is soul-saving.

Inclusion spreads people out, and those bonds are not connecting. Under the concept of inclusion, how are we going to meet each other?

If you are neurodivergent, ask yourself… how many of your friends are also neurodivergent?

I can tell you, I already know the answer. Your closest friends, you will say, all of them are neurodivergent. And I bet you, as an adult, meeting other people just like you and talking about your experiences has been part of your healing process and becoming comfortable in your skin.

If kids are spread out like a dropped clump of marbles in the education system, rolling out in all directions, how are they going to meet and have friendships with other kids that they can see themselves in? They won’t.

That makes my heart sink.

So, how can we have both?

How can we connect kids with each other and still give them an inclusive education?

CLUBS!?

What else can we do?

Some districts are closing their gifted programs. Are there other ways we can bring gifted kids together?

We need to figure out something. People with disabilities shouldn’t have to wait until they are adults to meet other people who are just like them. That is incredibly isolating.

The first time I met someone who stuttered, I realized we had more in common than the friends I grew up with. And my friends were the same gender as me, the same age, had the same teachers, grew up in the same neighbourhood. Yet, this person who I just met 5 min ago who stuttered, who was not my gender, not in my generation, from another country, we could say “me too” for the first time.

People who don’t have disabilities or who are neurotypical don’t realize this part. Just how important it is. You all get to see yourselves in another human being every time you leave your home and enter society.

A lot of us connect over the internet, Zoom into support groups, and gather at conferences.

In order for inclusion not to have its dark side, we need to figure out how to still connect kids and not just have them all spread out like a dropped clump of marbles.

More Blogs! More Lived Experience!

Hello Everyone!

I am adding 2 more blogs to my parent blog list.

I love it when people write and share themselves with all of us. There is so much to relate to and learn about.

  1. End Collective Punishment in Schools.

This is an excellent blog about the Appeals Process in Schools.

“You retell the story, often to someone hearing it for the first time—someone who cannot possibly hold the full weight of months of frustration, confusion, and cumulative impact. You must sound nice, since they might judge you, but you’re furious by then. Heart broken for what your child has suffered. They listen, they nod, and then they reiterate policy. Like you’ve never heard about policy:-(

It seems like less of a pursuit of resolution than an institutional ritual. Performative. Lip service.“

2. The Canary Collective

This is written by a teacher advocating for change in the system!!

“I am an educator, an advocate, and a witness to a system in urgent need of change. The Canary Collective is not about any one person. It is about the movement we must build together, a revolution grounded in truth, hope, and justice. It is a space where marginalized voices can speak freely, where silence is broken, and where a different future is imagined. Like the canaries once sent into coal mines to warn against toxic air, we raise our voices to reveal danger, name what is harmful, protect what is precious, and call for transformation before more harm is done. Together, we can reshape education into a system rooted in acceptance, belonging, and care. I believe that future is possible if we are brave enough to challenge discrimination, to dismantle exclusion, and to refuse the comfort of silence. This is a place for those who are ready to stop whispering and start building. Welcome to the Canary Collective.”

You will find these blogs listed on my Parent/Guardian blogs page

A big thank you to the creators for sharing themselves with us.

Another new HR decision – Intersecting Identity – Self-Representing Parent – A win!

I have written so many posts that start with New HR decision that it’s starting to sound ridiculous.

So, yes this is another new one. I know we just had a new one a couple of days ago.

I can’t tell you how exciting this is. This is the month of April, only four months into 2025 and we are already at 5 decisions with more to come. This is going to be quite the year!!

Is the Ministry of Education and Child Care paying attention to all of this????

They better wake up!

Here we go.

Decision #5 – This parent is self-representing. They won. The complaint is fully proceeding.

Child (by the Parent) v. School District, 2025 BCHRT 89

This case involves a couple of protected grounds.

[3] The Child identifies as Black and of African race, ancestry and place of origin. The Child has a mild Autism Spectrum Disorder [ ASD ], which the Parent describes as largely diagnosed from his late speech and asymptomatic.

This is a timeliness complaint

What is interesting about this case from an analysis point of view is that there were gaps between the discrimination and multiple allegations were beyond the one-year time limit, and yet it was still accepted.

[25] Having found multiple arguable contraventions of the Code , that are both timely and out of time, it is necessary to next consider whether the late-filed allegations form part of a continuing contravention.

[26] I first considered whether the allegations are of a similar character for the purposes of determining the existence of a continuing contravention of the Code . The School District argues the timely allegations are dissimilar because the timely allegations involve different children at different schools. I disagree with the School District. From my review of the allegations in their entirety, I agree with the Child that they involve the School District’s failure to properly respond in series of altercations where white male students harmed the Child for reasons related to his race, colour, ancestry, place of origin and mental disability. At the same time, the allegations are of a similar character because the Child alleges the School District’s repeated responses to all these incidents were unfair to him for reasons related to the personal characteristics identified. In my view, the similar character of these allegations is not affected in any material way because they occurred at different schools and with different white male children.

[27] I have next considered the existence of gaps between allegations. I have determined that there are no significant gaps for the purposes of s. 22(2) of the Code in this case. I disagree with the School District’s approach to this question by looking at the entire timespan for the allegations in question. In my view, it is more appropriate to look at the length of time between allegations to determine whether they occurred in succession. Here, there were gaps of half of year to about nine months between most of the allegations and these are explained by the somewhat randomness of serious incidents happening when the white male students engaged the Child. The only possibly significant gap in my view, occurred between the November 2019 incident and the Spring 2021 incident. However, this gap is easily explained by the fact that during most of 2020 schools were closed due to pandemic restrictions and the Child was not in physical proximity to the students in question.

[28] Overall, I am satisfied the Child’s allegations from the June 2018 incident to the Spring 2021 incident allegations are of a similar nature in succession to the timely October 2021 incidents allegations. As such, the Complaint is a timely continuing contravention of the Code and it is, therefore, unnecessary for me to determine whether it is in the public interest to allow any late filed allegations to proceed.

There are multiple allegations of bullying connected to racism and what I would label as ableism.

Here is an example.

[13] On October 20, 2021, the Child alleges three higher grade white boys followed him into the bathroom and one of the boys intentionally slammed a bathroom stall door into his face. The Child alleges this incident resulted in him chipping his two front teeth. He alleges the School District principal and vice principal were unmoved by the incident and did not want to report it to the police. The Child alleges the vice principal kept blaming him for screaming and shouting and rolling around on the floor as an attempt to magnify his autism behaviour to justify the other boys’ wrongdoing. Once again, the Child alleges the School District protected the white assailants from receiving any blame for the incident. This allegedly included the School District saying that they did not know which boy had caused the harm to the Child. The Child alleges this incident was a good example of the School District’s staff demonstrating their inclination to favour white children in altercations involving him [the October 20, 2021, incident ]

I encourage everyone to read this case in full.

The other human rights case that was connected to discriminatory bullying is this one. I’ll be adding this case now to that page as well.

Way to go, self-represented parent!